Purpose of life

haha... this is the first time someone ask me bout this... a professor from France... and like it or not I answer him frankly that im still searching... LOL (maybe he will vomit after that)

currently im unemployed... and for those that know me, i change job more than.... hmm... i can say i have great experience in working line.. hahaa...

when im 18, my tell people i want earn lots money... but after few years later, i notice money is not everything.. i once wish to own a business... so that i can become a entrepreneur... then i can earn lots money... for me, im lucky enough to notice that most business person have no time for themselves and their family... hence i change my mind...

so what is the purpose of my life? there are once a friend told me ( sorry this bit religious ya).. when a person passaway, they will go heaven, and they need give report to God... i was wondering... what will be the story that i wish to tell Him... how good i am in earning money? how many report or project i successfully complete? how many degree i get?

after give it a thought... i wish to tell Him how many people life i'd touch... of course im not saying my angel help lots people... but at least i plan help bit... learn from everything... how every little thing i do can help cheer or lighten them up...

like a story i read today... an old couple move to a new place where everyday all the college student will pass by... so everyday the couple will wave to those students who pass their window... morning, afternoon and evening... even when the old man had move to another place, the old lady still do so everyday... until one day one of the student invited the old lady to their college to attend one of the party that they organized specially for her... some sharing say that ' the old lady friendly waving act actually cheer them up and let them  have purpose to college everyday - the old lady must be waiting to wave at me..

so little act actually can touch a person life... of coz with my current situation i cant do much... i will start with a smile to stranger ( if im not grumpy or feel like killing or cursing that person >.<) and try do moer donations...

besides, as mention previous post... i still wish spend simple and calm time with my beloved partner one day... travel around the world...drink coffee.. chat etc... the older i am, the less i wish... i only wish for simple life... hahaha.... i can be very strong.. i can be workaholic... i can be achiever... but by end of the day... most time... i wish spend silent lovely time with my love one...

Another gone

Grandpa just leave us... happy that he no longer suffer but sad that we no longer be by his side..

He got a nice pair of grey eye. .. which non of his next generation get it...

Grandpa is a romantic person... He used to tell us how he court my grandma... even in old age he still love to tease my grandma..

He is a great grandpa. .. even though we not staying g together... but he always love seeing us chat n laugh together...

when see my grandma chat with him before he leave n heading to his 'new house'... heart really ache... 'you enjoy your new house. . ... bye'... seriously... non of us enjoy the impact most but her... sigh

Ah Kong. .. rest in peace lo... We will always miss you..

duty of a woman (my own theories)

as a woman, we play a lot of roles in our life... (the most basic one i mean... )
1. Children
2. lover/wife/gf/partner
3. parent
4. owner
5. employee
6. Sibling
7. ourselves
8. Friends


suddenly have this thought, maybe im a traditional girl la~ for me, the task of my life is as below priority (1 - most important, 6 less important)

1. Children
2. Lover/ wife/ GF/ partner
3. Sister 
4. owner of my pets (since i have no kids yet)
5. Friends
5. My self
6. Employee

for me i always try my best give my best to people i love, seeing them happy normally fulfilled me d... but if in another way of thinking, becoz of this some how i neglected myself... hm... end up some pretty women will win me because they look better... sometimes bit inbalance... because was disappointed not being appreciated for the thing been done... but in another way... those that doesnt appreciate my effort somehow not worth my times as well... oh well... i think i try my best to do 100% for everyone... specially myself

times chasing

goodness... i can feel i no longer young... getting older and sexier (sorry for those reader that just had meal :P)~ muahahahahhaha...

today use up bit money to pamper myself after so long... bought some "necessaries' for myself... notice that if i still take myself for granted sooner or later i will for sure regret... hehe... before i enter 3...i think i shall appreciate my 2... hahha...

lots families and friends actually cant recognize me d... most of them of coz praise me prettier (not sure true or not as well, and im so ugly meh last time T.T )... worst thing i ever heard is "eee, u slimmer wor~ lots of them size change d, surprisingly u still maintain ah"... hmmmm.... this motivate me more to maintain and improve my current size~! hmph~!! if possible i want it as sexy as those fitness model (huhuhu... once awhile dreaming ma)... hehehe... so that when old i still look hot~ muahahah

ok ok (erms)... sorry... bit lost control

i also notice that i also started to be more health concern d... need to think few times bout the food i consume according to my daily habit (if sleep late i try reduce heaty food) and my weekly diet... seriously, i can really feel the impact if i take myself for granted... why la last time when im still teenagers i never got such problem... i can even finish a box of ice cream and still no problem.. hmmm

anyways, im enjoy the whole process... because i know im become better (after lots people praising... kikiki)...

yeah~ im sexy and i know it

i like busy

this year a great year for me... starting back on track d... a thing that i notice during my busy schedule...
woman act MUST multitask.. or else they will use their extra time to simply think... seriously it happen on me

when i busy i will more focus on the things i want to do... because i know my schedule is pack hence i will focus so that i wont waste anytime and best if i can manage everything as planned. undeniable in between, i will never tell my love one 'im busy, later chat etc' i will always reply his msg (or shall i say watsapp according to the trend) or call him for some follow up... because for me, no matter how busy i am, he always in priorities... this include my families as well of coz...

when im alone too free... in most time i will start simply think... specially i have great imaginations... so you can guess how depress i will end up in most time... maybe im a lady... emotionally i need more attention even though most time people say im strong and independent (i am???)... hahaha

oh well... hope his positive energy keep flowing into my life~ and will let me built and share more happy and positive energy to people around me as well... hehehe...

Grumpy me

notice that my temper getting worst... aish~!!! suppose older the wiser... i feel opposite way... how ah/??? i lost patient easily recently... menopause???? oh my.... specialy when im hungry or lack of sleep... i will just silent and try control myself by not talking... those blind also can sense the aura from me~ hmmmmm..... no no no.... shouldnt be this way.... i think i shall go meditate... at least calm myself before it become a criminal ... huhuhu.... oummmmmm