Wednesday, July 16, 2014

This i Promise me

1. I promise to love this body, through good and bad, to respect it, to treat it with kindness and to feed it with appreciation always.
2. I promise to stop and smell the roses – to savor how I look and feel today and to accept that it’s never going to get better than this moment, right now, right here.
3. I promise never to be foolish enough to believe that there is any reason to be anyone other than me.
4. I promise to date the Wrong Guy, the Right Guy, the Mr. Right Now, the Mr. He’s-Just-Not-That-Into-Me Guy. I promise to date the guys who make my heart feel full of gladness and the guys who sometimes treat me wrong.
Then, I promise to know better and stick the douchey guys on the bench.
5. I promise to make mistakes – lots of mistakes, to go eagerly down the wrong road, to venture way off course. I promise not to play it safe.
6. And I promise to forgive myself wholeheartedly. I promise not to punish myself forever for things I did when I was sad, when I was happy, when I was young, when I was drunk, when I was lost on side street after side street in a European country where I didn’t even speak the language.
7. I promise never to keep my mouth shut, to speak up when I know my voice needs to be heard, to shout louder when it’s ignored. I promise not to apologize for how I feel, for what I believe in, for what I stand for.
I promise never to offer an apology just because it’s easy or expected or even encouraged.
8. I promise – today, tomorrow and every day – to put myself first, to chase after the things I want and never to settle for anything less than I know I deserve.
9. I promise never to confuse the man who loves me for my body and the man who loves me for my mind – and I promise never to settle for a man who doesn’t love me for both.
10. I promise to value my brain. To feed it well, with words and songs and lectures and books and movies and recipes and birthdays. I promise to cultivate and nurture it. To watch it grow strong.
11. I promise to pay it forward, to do what other women have done for me to other women.
12. I promise to give everyone a chance, even though it might be terrifying and risky and stupid and scary. I promise to step outside my comfort zone often.
13. I promise to know that being a woman always is enough. I promise never to feel limited or objectified or to feel that my body is the only thing people are interested in.
14. I promise to call my parents, even though I only have five minutes to talk and even though I’m about to lose service because the subway is beginning its slow dive underground.
I promise to ask them how they’re feeling, to miss them, to love them and to argue with them, to disagree with them and always, always to look after them.
15. I promise to drink too much, to sleep too late, to dance too hard, to stretch too long, to sing too loud and to eat too many nachos every time I have the chance.
16. I promise to be proud of how far I’ve come – even though I’m still going. I promise to look back not with pity or vengeance, but with gratitude. I’ve made it this far.
17. I promise to forgive and not to forget, to let time heal the wounds and to carry what I have learned so far with me as I go forward. I promise not to let that sadness drag me down.
I promise not to wish ill on past lovers. I promise to send them light, to let them go — and to move forward.
18. I promise to cry my eyes out each time my heart is broken, each time my emotions are wronged, each time it feels like I’ve singed every artery capable of love.
I promise to let myself have the time, space and Netflix it needs to grieve. And I promise not to apologize for it.
19. I promise to put on the too-high heels, the too-bright red lipstick and the too-short dress and not to mistake my femininity with “asking for it” or “sluttiness.”
I promise to celebrate these curves, this ass, this shape, these boobs, this skin-baring midriff because they’re mine.
20. I promise to be patient when things don’t go my way – to step back and realize that it’s all a process, and a journey like this doesn’t come together all at once, but piece by piece.
21. I promise to allow myself the opportunity to be jealous. To sit with it and to ask it questions but never to be governed by it. I promise to see it as room to grow and not the concrete tied to my ankles, holding me down.
22. I promise to make plans for tomorrow and today and for three weeks from now. I promise never to stop planning, always to want something more, always to plan for something greater and bigger and more exciting than the things I know today.
23. I promise to love. Always. To give it and to receive it, even when the giver isn’t worthy and when I don’t think I am, either. I promise to let it flow freely from me because it is the one thing that is bigger than I am – that will always be bigger than I am.
I promise to love even though it is the single most terrifying act any of us will ever do. I promise to give love and to take love when I need it least and when I need it most.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...


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